Gleam: Darkness of Light
by Kaioh Michiru
Summary: The Master of Ice struggles with his own inner conflicts towards the one that stole his heart - amidst being called to help a friend ... Yaoi Suzuki and Shishiwakamaru insinuation Chapter Four now available!
1. Still A Whisper On My Lips

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Yu Yu Hakusho is owned by its respective owners. I have no claim to anything  
having to do with the characters / episodes / series in general. This story is my own  
work devoted to the particular series. If asked by the creators, it will be taken down.  
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... Gleam ~ Darkness of Light ...  
Chapter I: Still A Whisper On My Lips  
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Brief Note: The title was taken from Touya's  
Image Song, "Gleam ~ Yami no Hikari"  
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The cold.   
  
Always cold.  
  
That was me though. The person I was supposed to be. The person I -had- to be. The person that   
was feared, respected and even looked up to.  
  
Those people intrest me.  
  
If they knew what was going on inside, would they still fear me? If they knew that I hated myself   
sometimes, would they still respect me? If they really knew the coward I was, would  
they still look up to me? No.  
  
Sitting cross-leggèd on my snow filled paradise, I gazed down at my reflection in   
the ice.  
  
"You need to shut your thoughts up," I spoke to my reflection, the same ice-blue eyes staring back   
up at me. "Look at what you've become ... you're all alone ... That will never change." I had to snap   
my gaze away from myself, somewhat sickened.  
  
"Master!" A voice called from behind me.  
  
"Stop calling me that," I stated flatly, not turning around to see who it was. I disliked being referred   
to as anyone's superior. Why they did it here was beyond me.  
  
A little white-haired girl in bare-feet, and a light blue knee-legnth dress came stopped breathless at my   
right side. She was obviously a little ice-maiden. No one would survive my present lifestyle choice   
otherwise. I did not change my position, I simply looked at her out of the corner of my eye.  
  
"So sorry," she apologized with a curtsie.  
  
"No matter. What do you want of me?" I un-crossed my arms.  
  
"This came for you," she handed me a letter.   
  
Finally I looked at her, then the piece of paper and took it from her small grip. "Thank you," I replied   
simply and she ran off.  
  
I examined the letter for a moment. No one should have known where I was. Was it some fool that   
wanted to challenge me? I hadn't fought in a long time ...  
  
"Oh well," I said to myself and broke the seal upon the paper -  
  
  
  
In haste, your skills are needed.  
  
Now you must decide.  
Everyone of you must make the choice,  
Everywhere there is a challange.  
Do you meet the qualifications?  
  
You have been chosen,  
Of the many competitors in the world.  
Until now you have been relaxing,  
Redeem your title.  
  
Heed the cry of battle,  
Everyone knows you cannot back down.  
Let us show you,  
Power beyond your imagination.  
  
From the Desk of the First Sector of Makai,  
Ruled by Yomi.  
  
Kurama  
  
  
At first, the writings confused me. Why was Kurama contacting me? And why in the Worlds was  
he seeming to write in foolish poetry? Did he think it appealed to me? I was ready to toss the letter  
aside, deciding it was a joke, and began to crumple it up.  
  
Then the message was clear.  
  
The first letter in every scentence - I NEED YOUR HELP. It made a small smile curl on my usually  
frown-stricken lips. Kurama hadn't yet lost his touch. But - What was he doing in the Makai!? And with  
Yomi no less? Maybe he was captured ... No, then how could he get the letter out and why was he  
trying to make it seem like an invitation?  
  
Folding the letter and placing it inside my belt, I finally stood up and looked into the hazy horizon.  
How was I supposed to get to Makai? I began to walk towards a region I could make a quick getaway  
to the human plane. I ran through his choice if words again and again. 'Everyone one of you-' he  
had said. So there were more then just me? I wonder if ... No, it is best not to get my hopes up, I slapped  
myself back to reality.  
  
The passageway to the human plane stood right before me. I closed my eyes and stepped in, spreading  
my arms for the 'dimensional,' trip.  
  
"Is this what it's like to be free?" I asked myself aloud. The flying sensation did not last long as the end  
of the tunnel was in view, and I landed with both feet upon the hard rock ground of the human world.  
  
It was night here, so it was not too much brighter then I was used to. As I looked at my new surroundings,  
I could see a temple up at the top of the mountain peak. The pathway leading up was covered in good-will  
spells, warding off evil.  
  
I rolled my eyes and started up the path to the temple. I could feel a healthy amount of Spirit Energy  
raditating from the area. Someone powerful was near. There were also odd amounts of Demon Energy  
creeping its way into the air. As I kept walking, I could see a tall figure near the entrance, yelling  
something to a significantly shorter person.  
  
And -he- was there also.  
  
Floating cross-leggèd as he usually did, arms behind his head. I could hear him laughing. His untamed red  
hair cascading around his handsome face as he turned in my direction. His royal blue eyes filled with  
mischief focus on me and he smiled, waving.  
  
I swallowed and waved back with a tight smile, my heart ready to leap out of my chest.  
  
"Touya!" he yelled, happy to see me, his friend, again.  
  
His ... -friend- damn it.  
  
Not slowing or quickening my pace, I finally stood near the group. It was only four of us. Chuu with Rinku  
on his shoulder, myself and of course ... Jin.  
  
Perfect Jin. Master of the Wind. He had stolen my heart ... Although I would never let him know it. Afraid  
to catch myself, or have someone else catch me, staring at him, I cleared my throat and gazed at Chuu and  
Rinku.  
  
"What is exactly the meaning of this?" I asked either of them.  
  
Chuu finished up the remainder of his bottle and wiped his mouth, looking at me. He shrugged. "Genkai's  
here, says were uh, waiting for two more."  
  
"Oh?" I inquired, crossing my arms.  
  
I felt a playful punch in my arm, catching my by surprise. I turned around to see Jin's mischevious grin  
toying with my heart again. "Hehehe," he laughed through his teeth. "Shishiwaka and Suzuki still aren't  
here. Don't wanna know what they're doing, eh?!" he joked, and elbowed me in the side.  
  
"Heh ... no ... " I said, rubbing my arm. All I had to do was not pay attention to him, and I would be fine.  
My thoughts would not listen to that reasoning though ... So he thought Shishiwakamaru and Suzuki  
were an item ... ? Then ... why couldn't he read between the lines with me? 


	2. A Feeling At My Fingertips

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... Gleam ~ Darkness of Light ...  
  
Chapter II: A Feeling At My Fingertips  
  
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Pensivly, I leaned against the far wall of the shrine, a little bit away from the rest of the crowd. Shishiwakamaru and Suzuki had finally arrived, and now we were just waiting for Kurama. Genkai, whom sat at the read of the room, said that he was due any minute.  
  
Oh Gods, why can't this just be over? Why must I be tortured so?  
  
My eyes, always the betraying ones, lifted to catch a glimpse of Jin. He was floating as always, looking thoughtful and bored. He must have felt my eyes on him, for in an instant he was gazing back at me with a titled head. Now he wore a tight smile and waved. I blushed, and prayed that my cheeks weren't as red as I thought they were.  
  
"Oi, Touya why're you all by yourself? C'mon and join us, we don't bite!" He said playfully, taunting me, making me ache.  
  
I cleared my throat and averted my eyes from him. "I ... uh ... " He didn't wait for me to make up some lame sounding excuse. He just floated over with ease and grabbed my right wrist.  
  
On the inside, just from that simplest of touches, I felt an electric wave travel from my wrist, to my head and then to my feet. My heart raced. "C'mon, c'mon!" he cried, pulling me towards the group as I was still recovering. "There, that's better!" he said triumphantly, my cheeks most likely still blazing. Instead of looking up to see Jin though, I looked at the rest of the group. Suzuki was the closest, standing just in front of me. He had an arm leaning against Shishiwakamaru and a wide grin appeared upon the 'Beautiful Soldier's,' face as I looked at him. Then he just winked.  
  
Am I that obvious!?  
  
Nervously, I cleared my throat again and crossed my arms, with him floating next to me. If my heart didn't slow down soon, I'd have a heart attack.  
  
But then I'd have nothing to worry about ... I thought sinesterly.  
  
Just then, Kurama decided to make his entrance. He slid open the door and closed it before he even looked at us. He was dressed in a long overcoat and had a sly look upon him.  
  
"About time!" Rinku shouted.  
  
"Maa, the man's got work!" Chuu scolded, pulling Rinku's hat down over his eyes.  
  
The red-headed young man walked over to Genkai and thanked her, then eyed us over, as if examining us. "I'm glad you all were able to make it here," he said calmly. "So gather that you all realized the hidden message I included?"  
  
Chuu scratched his head. He was to my left. "Hidden message? I didn't get one of those ... But I liked your poetry!" he grinned and laughed.  
  
"Heh," Kurama started again, "anyway ... I need to ask a favor from you all. You see - there is trouble in the Makai ... Each Ruler of their own third of the plane has called upon their own respectable fighters to help them-" he continued.  
  
None of us said anything, to disturb the speech, although in all honesty I was not really listening. I did not need some story to convince me to help Kurama, I looked up to him and of course I would help him. I took this oppertunity to close my eyes and attempt to breath calmly, still basking in feeling Jin's presence so close.  
  
Suddenly I heard joyful cries and I snapped my eyes open, seeing everyone with satisfied expressions.  
  
"I can go shopping for more sake!" Chuu cried, then laughed loudly.  
  
"It'll feel good to get some exercise!" Jin reasoned, stretching, then finally settling down upon the ground to stand. "Like the old days ... but ... not evil and better!" he laughed and elbowed my side again. "C'mon Touya, you'll be my partner, right!?"  
  
The questions caught me off-guard. The thought of possibly hurting Jin ... But mind you, I was all for the physical contact!  
  
Oh Gods! What am I saying!? "I ... uh ... "  
  
Jin laughed again. "That's all you've been saying today! Are ya tired? Sick? What'sa matter?" he tilted his head.  
  
My heart went off on its own again ... Was Jin ... worried about me?  
  
"Eh? Touya?" he continued.  
  
"Ah! Touya!" Thank God for Suzuki ... he came up and patted my shoulder. "You said you were going to go out for a run with Rinku and me, remember?"  
  
"I ... uh ... yes!" The look in the blonde's eyes commanded me not to say otherwise. He knew anyway ... didn't he? That look he gave me when I blushed ... yeah, he knew.  
  
"Maa ... Then you better get back soon, Touya. I want to start training!" With that, the red-headed Master of Wind flew off to laugh with Kurama and Genkai.  
  
I looked at at Suzuki and let out a breath greatfully. "Thank you, Suzuki- san. I-I think that you pretty much know- ... " I needed someone to talk to ... didn't I? And who better then Suzuki? I mean he and Shishiwakamaru ...  
  
Suzuki smirked down at me and dragged me by the shoulder. "Come on Loverboy," he said simply and Rinku followed suite. 


	3. Keeps Pulling at My Skin

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... Gleam ~ Darkness of Light ...  
  
Chapter III: Keeps Pulling At My Skin  
  
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AN: I know it has taken me forever and a year to get things back on track here,   
  
but there are some other things I need to review about the series before   
  
finishing this story, and I have misplaced the episodes for the time being. ''   
  
I'm trying my best though, to continue as best I can without, and in finding them.   
  
I hope my absence isn't turning anyone off of my story Oo''  
  
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I walked with my head down, none of the three of us really saying anything. I took   
  
in a breath every now and then when I thought I had some way of explaining myself,   
  
or someway of perhaps spinning lies out of it, but everytime I opened my mouth   
  
words seemed trivial.  
  
Rinku, to my left, was the first to break.  
  
"Why are you both so quiet? Why aren't we training? Kurama needs our help!"  
  
Suzuki, who was on my right, reached behind me to hit the boy in his head, upsetting   
  
the balance of his hat.  
  
"What's that for!?" Rinku roared.  
  
"Sh!" The blonde countered sharply.  
  
The other did close his mouth, but he narrowed his eyes defiantly. "Why did you call   
  
Touya loverboy?"  
  
That stopped my dead in my tracks. The other two continued a step more, then they   
  
stopped as well, noticing my lack of motion. Suzuki glared and the yo-yo bearing child.  
  
I wasn't upset though. I looked up in wonder and happiness. If Rinku didn't know,   
  
maybe I wasn't as obvious as I thought! Jin may still not have noticed anything!  
  
"You.. You mean you don't know?" I asked, full of hope.  
  
"Know WHAT?" he was starting to get annoyed and looked up at Suzuki, who wore a   
  
blank expression. "Oh," as if silence had given him all of the answers. "About Jin. Who   
  
WOULDN'T know that?"  
  
Defeated, I sunk my neck into my shoulders. Damn damn damn.  
  
Rinku's reply earned him another slap upside his head from our other companion.   
  
Then he came and lay a hand on my shoulder. "Touya what do you want to do?"  
  
I shook my head without looking up. How was I supposed to know? I'd lived without   
  
seeing Jin since the last tournament, but now that seemed next to impossible. However,   
  
living WITH Jin seemed to be it's neighbour. "I don't know." I said in a dejected tone.   
  
Was there really anything else I could do besides lick the wounds I had cut for myself?  
  
"Do you want to tell him?" the blonde pursued.  
  
"No!" I said quickly.  
  
"Then do you want to just leave him?" Rinku entered the conversation.  
  
I met the brunette's eyes. " ... No."  
  
"Ah, you don't know what you want," he became frustrated and walked ahead, until he   
  
planted himself down on a rock.  
  
"He's right." I admitted.  
  
"Well, until you figure it out, we should focus on helping Kurama."  
  
"Personal feelings ... They shouldn't get in the way no matter what," I scolded myself,   
  
feeling ashamed. "Don't worry," I continued like a battered child, "I won't let him get to   
  
me."  
  
Suzuki tilted his head. "Isn't it too late for that?"  
  
I didn't reply. I turned away and just started walking back. Physical battle, emotional   
  
battle, they were all one and the same.  
  
I tried to look at the world in monotone on the way back. Everything was dismal gray   
  
and a slight nip in the air even confirmed my inner most feelings, until I reached   
  
Genkai's shrine again. I opened that door and came face to face with what seemed like   
  
sping time.  
  
Jin's bejewling eyes brought music to the world. I hadn't noticed the sun on my way back,   
  
but now it seemed to shine like tomorrow was the end.  
  
"Touya!" He cried, jumped up from his conversation with Chuu, and ran over to me. He   
  
carried a bottle of sake in his hand, no doubt Chuu's. However, the Master of Wind proved   
  
that he wasn't so well balanced on his feet. There was a corner of rug over-turned which  
  
caught his foot. "Iyaaa!" he red-head cried, as he seemed to dive at me. I tried to back up,   
  
but instead of reeling, Jin came reeling into my arms, sake first.  
  
He looked up at me, and I swore at that point I was going to faint. He wide eyes danced   
  
with so much emotion. I knew at that point I didn't want to let go. Ever.  
  
There was a burning in my chest. I thought it was my heart exploding until I burned with  
  
intensity. It seemed as if time had stopped for Jin and I, unitl I screamed out in pain.  
  
Jin started to yell as well. He regained his composure and stood up in front of me, his mouth   
  
dropping open. "The sake! The sake! It's burning through your clothes, Touya!"  
  
I didn't know what I do. "Ah!" I cried, batting at the liquid running over my shirt.  
  
Jin was the one that acted though. "Get it off Touya! Get it off!"  
  
I felt faint. The burning hurt, but Jin was the main cause. I crumbled to the ground. The   
  
red-head jumped on top of me, and started ripping off my shirt.  
  
Oxygen was foregin to me. Almost, I could see that light. Almost I could touch it.  
  
My shirt was ripped away, just as the door opened.  
  
Suzuki and Rinku walked back in. I was about to hyper-ventilate. The blonde wore a wide  
  
grin smiling at my ripped shirt. The other laughed. "Touya! You made up your mind!"  
  
Jin turned his attention back to me, still on top of me. He was breathing hard as well.   
  
"Made up your mind about what?" 


	4. You

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... Gleam ~ Darkness of Light ...  
  
Chapter IV: You ...  
  
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"Well?" Jin continued to pursue when I did not answer his question.   
  
Under the surface, I was drowing in the sea of deceit I had clouded   
  
myself in, scraping for a way out.  
  
I thought it seemed as though Rinku was suffering the same sort of   
  
fate I was at this point though. It was obvious that he wished he had   
  
swallowed his words instead of letting them fall from his lips, when   
  
obviously it wasn't the case.  
  
"Naa! Touya! Ya mean you're gonna be my partner?!" He cried, and   
  
put his face down closer to mine. The hip of his gleaming white horn   
  
tapped my forehead. He wore that impish grin still, and one of his eye   
  
teeth protruded.  
  
The tamer of the Devil Yo-yo stepped in to be my saviour. "No! Mine!"   
  
I blinked. "Touya told me I could be his partner so he could teach me   
  
something I wanted to learn of his!" Jin pulled back away from me, I   
  
sucked in the breath I had forgotten to take all this while. I had to   
  
remind myself that I needed air to live, and could not just survive on the  
  
intoxication of Jin.  
  
Rinku just kept on going though, "Then! When we.. were out on the  
  
walk, yeah, he said that he'd tell you, and he thought you'd beat him   
  
up for it! So.. when.. when we came in, I thought you were killing Touya,   
  
Jin!"  
  
Shishiwakamaru stifled a chuckle, and Suzuki threw him a warning glance.  
  
Seems it was Genkai's turn to save the day though. she slide the door   
  
open, then slammed it, looking up at the lot of us. I just stared at her   
  
blinking.  
  
"Training begins today," she said cooly, "We will begin at the other side   
  
of the moutain. You had better be there. Fast." then she left as abruptly   
  
as she had come.  
  
Regretablly, at that point Jin got up and walked over to the remaints of   
  
my poor shirt. "Maa.. Sorry Touya," he said in a dejected tone. "It was   
  
just burning and it happened so fast ... I'll fix it." He picked up all of the   
  
rags and held them in a bundle, then left them room with his head bowed.  
  
Rinku came up behind me. Still I had not said anything, and still I knew   
  
not what to say. "Touya, wear this shirt for training," he offered a skimpy   
  
wife beater. "It's a little big on me, but it should do just for this while."  
  
Suzuki came up as well. They were forever going to be my close allies in   
  
this little adventure it seemed. The blonde lifted me to my feet, brushed   
  
me off and looked me over, then nodded to himself. "Well, no doubt that   
  
you're going to have to co-ordinate with Rinku's dirty rag- I mean the  
  
shirt he's lending you. I have some black sweat pants that will match."  
  
When I heard that, I thought he wanted to tell me something in private.   
  
Though when we exited the room, he was actually serious. "I want you   
  
to look pretty," he grinned, then left me to change.  
  
.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.  
  
We all piled around one another. All of us out of our usual wear. I felt a   
  
little uncomfortable in these clothes though. They weren't the fine silky   
  
material I was used to. Stupidly, I felt ugly in them, wanting Jin to see   
  
me in more flattering clothes.  
  
Not surprisingly, Rinku's shirt wasn't really too small on me. Really, I was   
  
shorter then I always tried to make myself out to be.  
  
Jin hadn't looked my way once since our little endeavour. Maybe..   
  
maybe he hated having been that close to me.  
  
Kurama entered with Genkai.  
  
Chuu grinned merrily and felxed his biceps. "Wait until they see this!"   
  
He laughed, then at the flip of a coin grew serious. "It's been a long time  
  
since we had a serious fight."  
  
Rinku was pearched on his shoulder. He sucked in a deep breath through   
  
his nose and looked satisifed. "We're gonna be a lot stronger now though!"  
  
Jin stood near the two of them. "Just got to work harder and then ... "   
  
he trailed off.  
  
I nodded, enthusiastic to hear Jin's voice again. "I'm eager to fight   
  
again."  
  
Suzuki leaned on Shishiwakamaru's shoulder. "We're going to give it our   
  
all this time, that's for sure."  
  
The lavender haired warrior scoffed. "Don't work too hard you may pull   
  
something Suzuki."  
  
Kurama looked pleased himself. "To restore the balance between   
  
Ningenkai and Reikai!"  
  
Everyone was enthralled in the thought now. "Right!" we call cried,   
  
and teamed up.  
  
.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.  
  
Kick, kick, punch, punch, block that, counter this. It went on like this   
  
for sometime. Though, I learned well enough not to judge by size.   
  
Rinku was a force to be reckoned with. Jin had paired up with Chuu.  
  
I stole a glance at him, and saw him come alive. Jin lived for a   
  
challenging fight. I suppose that was like his.. light. His already enticing   
  
eyes took on an enchanting glow, and I was lost too long in them..  
  
Ouff.  
  
Rinku had landed a kick in my jaw. I caught a smirk on the boy's face   
  
as if he was trying to teach me a lesson in discipline when it came to   
  
staring at Jin. I grinned in return, not really sure what I felt at this point.  
  
.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.-=*=-.,.  
  
We were instructed to go outside for what we thought would be a break   
  
from all the work. No one complained though, as far as I knew we were   
  
all enjoying being able to exercise to what was almost our full potential.  
  
It wasn't a exactly the right kind of break we were outside for though.  
  
Chuu was taken ahead to a break in the moutains by Genkai, given a   
  
bottle of sake, and ruthlessly pushed by her off of the edge.  
  
"Chuu!" Rinku yelled, running to the ledge.  
  
Genkai laughed.  
  
We all rushed over. Chuu was standing on a tight rope, drinking. When   
  
he had had a sufficent amount out of the bottle, he laughed, gained   
  
the right footing, and set about corssing the rope. He wasn't amused   
  
halfway through this. "Bad enough I have to play ballerina!" he yelled,  
  
"But drunk?!"  
  
All of us watched from the side, when all of a sudden, he lost his footing   
  
completely, cursed and began his plummet to the rocks below. His scream   
  
didn't last though, as it turned to that familiar laughter again and there was   
  
a great commotion of rocks being broken as he landed safetly.  
  
Rinku was next. He was in the middle of a similar break in the mountains,   
  
though he stood on what could be considered a pedestal.  
  
"DEVIL YO-YO! FULL POWER!" He yelled, as he sent reeling four at a time,   
  
then five from the other hand, crushing the mountain around him. Five from   
  
the right foot, five from the left.  
  
He stopped, breathing heavily. Then he looked up at the lot of us, showing   
  
the cervace between his right thumb and index finger.   
  
"I still have one left over!" he cried.  
  
The attack was impressive though.  
  
I couldn't tell ig Kurama was pleased. He stood off to himself with an odd   
  
look on his face. It seemed a look I had not encountered when it came to   
  
him before. It puzzled me, and he turned away. I wanted to talk to him,   
  
see what had made him so different this past while, but Genkai's words   
  
proved to have another purpose.  
  
"Don't think it's all done yet! You need more training! In order to survive   
  
in the Makai, you're going to need a lot mroe then just fancy drinks   
  
and toys!"  
  
We all looked to one another, though Jin still wouldn't meet my eyes.  
  
I hated my eyes anyway. Cold, steely.. Too small and beady.   
  
He probably hated them as well..  
  
"Right!" The group called again, this time without me. We all took off   
  
into the air though, for tomorrow we would be in the presence of Yomi,   
  
having to prove ourselves.  
  
And be damned if any of us were going to look the fool in front of him. 


End file.
